A dear friend recently commented to me that she thinks I’m still grieving. Her sensitivity pulled me up short; and upon reflection, I have to agree.
Mourning is not always for loss of a loved one through illness such as Alzheimer’s disease or death. Whomever is left behind also grieves for “what was once ours” – including lifestyle and standards of everyday living, our own physicality, and the comfort of long term relationships. When a shift comes, even though we see it looming on the horizon, it’s a collision of old and new.
Today, my grief for everything and everyone gone is sharp. Accepting that I’m not invincible is a hard swallow. Recognizing my accomplishments is vital, we all need to pat ourselves on the back now and then and know that with each baby step we move forward.
I attended a benefit concert here in Bracebridge on Friday. It was my first night out since March when I fell on the ice and injured my back. The progress of my snail’s pace improvements includes grief for loss of physicality. Then resilience resurfaced when I saw the young accident-victim whose life is forever altered. Sometimes we need a wake-up call to put things in perspective!
On this commemorative Mother’s Day, cherish what you have, recall with affection who you may have lost, and keep taking those baby steps to work through your grief. We can’t “get over it” but we can get around it.